Tonight, I started writing about Photoshop brushes and the different types there are, as well as some the techniques you could use while drawing with those brushes. Then, I suddenly realized that talking about Photoshop brushes isn’t as important as other things in life.

For once, I actually realized my own mortality tonight.

It’s really hard to articulate what I am truly feeling right now, especially since the feelings came suddenly. As many of you know, I post on a soap opera forum, and according to my profile, I’ve been posting there since June 12, 2008. For some reason, I don’t remember posting that long, but that is besides the point. Throughout my time on the forum, I have met several great people who I am honored to call “friends.” Each person has his/her own quirks, obsessions, and stories, and I find it great that many of the people are willing to share their life struggles. Many of the women I’ve talked to are cancer survivors or are trying to beat the disease right now. At first, I would read their stories and comment with kind words, meaning every bit of encouragement I offered. For awhile, some of these women were just words and a screen name, but the more I talked to them and saw the people beneath the text, I realized how real each person was. For me, their words became words of wisdom; words to ponder. One lady who’ve I’ve spoken to the past few weeks has really caught my attention. To me, she seems so strong and courageous, even when the stakes are down. I admire how she uses humor and her good nature to explain her feelings and her pain, and I’ve come to look forward to posting with her. However, while taking a shower tonight, my thoughts wandered to the soap opera board and my heart suddenly ached and tears fell from my eyes like a sweeping shower. The possibility of “what if she’s no longer here” crossed my mind and I felt so sad for her, her family, and all of us who have grown to love her. I hate that line of thinking– what if– but it crashed upon me so hard that I couldn’t help but feel anguish for thinking that way and for wondering that. I felt a huge void, one I haven’t felt since my sister passed away fourteen years ago. Except, the difference between now and fourteen years ago is that now, I realize the importance of life and how short life really is. Click to read more …

Tags: Anal Cancer, Cancer, Cancer Specialists, Death, Farrah Faucet Cancer, Life, Liver Cancer, Nature, Survival

Hello everyone! How are you all today? I’m in an allergy-induced cloud right now and it sucks. Certain ways I move, it feels like my head is about to explode! C’est la vie! I don’t like it one bit.

I was searching through my Sheezy Art page recently and I came across a lot of my old poetry I wrote. Wow, I used to have a lot of darkness burning within me. Much of poetry was depressing! It’s funny, because generally, I’m not a depressed person anymore. So why the difference? My first two years of college I was dealing with a stalker ex-boyfriend who was rather abusive when I dated him. I made a lot of mistakes with this man that I am now smart enough to avoid, but I have a lot of regrets because of things I did to save myself from his fist. I had a lot of angst and depression because of all of it, but, because of it, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. A lot of my humor stems from my tragedies I faced in life, as well as all the craziness that ensues around me. It just amazes me where people’s strength comes from and I’m proud of everyone who can muster strength to surive anything.

As I mentioned in previous posts, writing helped me get through a lot of stress and darkness. Like the aforementioned, a lot of my writing had a darkened tone to it, but I did have some humorous poetry and stories mixed in. So, today, I would like to share with you some of my writing from the past. Here goes!

Love Always,

Mari

Click to read more …

Tags: Creating Poetry, Dark Poetry, darkness, Death, Depression, Dying, How to Write Poetry, Macabre, Poetry, Sheezy Art, Suicide Poetry, Writing Poetry

According to Alex, “anything can be considered art as long as it promotes thought” (Beckett, “What is Art?”). In Sketching House’s first blog, I said that “everything is art,” in a very broad and general way without really elaborating on what I meant by that; that was back in October (Dominguez “Everything is Art!”). However, I’m an academic and a stickler for details and the “why” factor, so I feel rather foolish now for saying “everything is art,” when, in fact, there are cases where things done in the “name of art” is drawing the line between creating and doing something abnormal and citing art as the reason. After analyzing Alex’s post (I’m a Bachelor’s in English, analyzing is what I do), I shall now reply to what his thoughts of what art is with my rebuttal on what I now think should be considered art. Click to read more …

Tags: Abortion, Aliza Shvarts, Art, Artforms, Cosmetology, Death, Dying, Eminem, Family, Funeral Rights, Human Body, John McCain, Ludacris, Lyrics, music, Port-Mortem Cosmetology, Post-Mortem Art, Sarah Palin, Saw, Women's Rights, Yale University